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Showing posts from September, 2005

Wicker Park; Aqualung; Strange and Beautiful

I've been watching your world from afar,

I've been trying to be where you are,

And I've been secretly falling apart, I'll see.

To me, you're strange and you're beautiful,

You'd be so perfect with me but you just can't see,

You turn every head but you don't see me.

I'll put a spell on you,

You'll fall asleep and I'll put a spell on you.

And when I wake you, I'll be the first thing you see,

And you'll realise that you love me.

Yeah... Yeah...

Sometimes, the last thing you want comes in first,
Sometimes, the frist thing you want never comes,
And I know, the waiting is all you can do,
I'll put a spell on you,
You'll fall asleep, I'll put a spell on you,
And when I wake you, I'll be the first thing you see,
And you'll realise that you love me.
I'll put a spell on you, You'll fall asleep 'cos I'll put a spell on you,
And when I wake you, I'll be the first thing you see,
And you'll rea…


Today a difficult roomate taught me something.. the value of motherhood.

what does she know, she's not living my life~ isn't that exactly why there's a problem? So many times, mummy, i knw i've thought that and maybe i still do. I know i do. I keep thinking that ur not good enough to even try to understand what I am going through, why i do so much shit behind your back.

but then today, i realized that thinking that is exactly that~ u will never understand what I'm going through if I don't tell you. I can't like 'she' did, expect to book myself a room and wait, for u to find me and ask me wt's wrong.. i need to tell u things more often.. i knw that and probably some day i'll get down to telling u all this..

bt till then.. i just remembered a couple of things. Like turning 18.. it was wit u n chennai.. it wasn't even my b'day, bt that lil trip by the beach in the hot sun.. sand so hot we HAD to walk wit our slippers on, eating steamed cha…

Monash Ball 2005

mmm.. neglected blog of myne!

to run down on the past week's events
bag got booted by bikersearrings got booted by unknwn individual/group ball happened..bangsar on a broke nite happenedconcert at backroom happenedthat was my week.. and if i may add.. it was an eptiomy of how bitter sweet life can be.

Interesting Reads if in doubt, do check this article out. nasa plans on how to build a base on the moon, that will serve as launch stations from which we can go to MARS!! incase that interests you even more.


Avi's griping.. he's making an entry in here after aaaaaages.....

bt yes.. sanjana n babs.. if either of u read it.. please jes go make casual talk wit him.. jes how are u avi, wt's been happening.. then beginning and the end..

i wrote some mean things today.. to bth him n this gal whose name i dun even she sounds lost.. in her own emotions.. seems like a nice person who just can't be politically correct.. like in one of the replies to her commentary section she says.. i'm good to everyone, even black ppl.... which offended me, bt didn't at the same time..

wt i wrote...

Sabitha said...

hello!!! I'm blog hoppin.. and i was wondering whether it's she that is obsessed with the bf or you that is obssesed with ur bf.. cz really no one should be able to steal ur bf if he loved you.. and another thing,

the whole 'malay' attack.. it's racist, and i could call u slit eyed or flat nosed,yellow skinned, straight haired, ug…

I hate Cinderella

can't find shoes... tried midvalley n pyramid n one utama... and the saddest thing is tht i kept forgetting to bring my dress.. so i kept forgetting the colour.. so ya.. dreams come true after all huh.. this is sadness.. and stressfullness,...
dun think i have visited so many malls in my life at one go..for one elusive thing... i'm dying... and it'll be a real surprise if i look like ne thing at all.. on ball nite... bt then again, i'm dressing for myself rite.. hell yea... =(

The Wisecrack blabs at three thirty four in the morn..

Wanna be lankan spent the weekend locked out of my room... the refugee camp was the hall n DD's room... i swear.. saw my bed, saw my room after a lil bit more than 24 hours and was so happy.. made myself a cuppa coffee n ice.. hyperactive kid.. atoms cheerleading now.. and decided that it's abt time i cut the crap and started on my work.. piled up sky high.. apart frm tht looks like the snail is finally reaching the finishin line for marquez's chronicle...can't wait to raid the section of the lib in preparation fr the one week break.. so much sought after by ME..

on issues seperate.. need to remember resolves...

one, please control the green-ness of emotions.. i have to.. for the sake of living n well.. having wt is precious not precariously floating about u, away frm u.. u have to be, i have to be

two, believe in what u preach, no really i have to listen to myself more often.. or rather jes listen more often

three, risks are fr things that can be risked..

four, jumping th…

Cz its Fraiday Naite

Asra's B'day.. Jiv's b'day... ha ha fun nite out yesterday...

broke quite a few virginities last nite.. had wt i would call my first ladies' nite out... i mean that in a proper way.. small group of significance..small tiny lil bar.. older men everywhere...a small teeny bit of uncovered space (uncovered meaning by tables and what not).. squeezing into that space, dancing arnd all the men... ha ha.. went to karma fr the first time.. was not drunk at a sayfol gig for the first time...

now that is something that i would never be happy with doin.. especially when i can say that there wasn't ne guys with us for so called 'protection'.. bt essentially it was all good in the hood, we had the school crew arnd.. balraj baleh baleh-ing arnd.. raben i think cn do a pretty good imitation of of a rapper.. esp wit his lil cap... arasan..posing a danger to us more thn protecting us.. bt in that, he did keep the sleazier guys away i suppose... rajiv in his lil corner.. ha…

A dream boat for me.....

Although emissive displays exhibit a quasi-Lambertian emission, the anisotropy of the electro-optic effect that controls light transmission in liquid-crystal displays (LCDs) causes the pixel luminance to vary, sometimes strongly, with the viewing angle. These variations are not identical for all gray levels and can eventually cause gray-scale inversions. We compare methods currently used to measure angular luminance variations in the LCDs: the goniometric method, the telescopic method, and the conoscopic or Fourier-optics method. We show that, although they are the same at the high end of the gray scale, the results of the three methods differ significantly at lower gray levels. In some cases the measured luminance was as much as 38% higher for the conoscopic system, and 26% higher for the telescopic method, than the value obtained with the goniometric approach. This shift in the minimum luminance measurement translates directly into the contrast ratio, affecting the reporting of tech…

Men & Womyn?

Ok.. men are of two types, the pushovers-that you can appeal with you apparent 'innocence' (ha ha) or the sort that are mean-regardless of your sex.. bt at the end of the day they are human.

The past week there have been all sorts of 'men' on my mind..

boyfriends and ex's who beat their girlfriends up.. i think i went into a mini-shock yesterday when someone asked a girl friend where she got the bruises on her arms from and whilst anyone could see that she was tempted to make excuses, gladly, she didn't. It scared me, becz i've always looked at her as a pillar- not a pillar of support or so called moral strength bt a steady pillar that stands the heaviest of weights. And if she can fall, to the temptation of so called love, then really, what's to say of ne one of us? So i didn't say anything, bt asked her wt she'd done. She said she took pictures, i told her pictures mean nothing unless it's been reported.. if nt to the police (because that is…

Woot Woot its Friday!

Went out last nite.. bangsar it was, castle it was again...

merdeka nite being the last time i went there, then before that again wit jiv n lisha, then before wit the crew frm school.. too many times.. way too many times..

had me drink, then went on dancing... spun out of control into cockpit with DD, ran out at the crazy frog song.. then we spun into absolute.. out at crazy frog song.. then rox.. danced like maniacs to la tortura...

we've been dancing to that the whole of this week... ever since i got it frm babs... rox has an interesting concept now.. leaves everywhere.. flower petals on the steps up.. flowers hooked on the stair railings.. coconut leaved-roof-bar.. nice indian gal, plaited hair, big smock sorta thing over blue jeans.. dancin to la tortura- el kampung style.. DD n i had a laugh after wit Izwan back at castle.. jes in time for.. the crazy frog song..

we din wanna leave so we put our hands up in the air ne ways.. and feng tau-ed.. shake head shake head... then to sati…

Absurd Realities of the Dirt Headed Monster

I'm nt going to whine.. i will not do that...

either ways ruined someone's surprise.. i din mean to.. bt really wt the hell.. i cudn care less, i din mean to.. so if offense is taken.. to the wall u will speak...

Apart from than that, i feel like i have one foot in the air, while the other stays on the board from which if i leapt, it would be a fall hard enough to nt only knock the breath out of me bt the life too... teetering on the edge of things, trying not to succumb to the extreme irritation that i feel inside..constantly nagging at me and pestering me, fighting the urge to scream at the nearest person to annoy me in the slightest way...

I did that today, sorry Fikri.. he was presenting and he was clicking his pen at the same time, prb because he was nervous or like me edgy.. i put my hand up, whilst he was still on his presentation mode standing there under the air cond blowing at him and his messed up hair (that i can't seem to shut up abt either) , and told him to sto…

Muse Me

Iit's gonna be one of those weeks, where sweaty-humid nites are gonna be spent in the hall, lazy days in class, the library and the bed.. u know one, when tuesday itself sees you begging for the weekend to rush n come..

Emotionally taxing and bodily tiring..

I wanna put my feet up on the table, n say, "hey! How's life today? I'm doin great"
Bt instead i say, "wt's new?"

The brunt of sarcasm borne by the cynic is harmful to even the pessimist in that person.
Everyone can be independant, bt it's nice to just unload everything onto a cart and send it on the fast track to kingdom come.

Like i've said, damn Cinderella, n Snow White n all the others.. those that made me want 2 and those that make me find 1 unnaturally displeasurable...

But, it only makes u stronger.. wt do they say again? pave the roads today, to walk on tommrow.

Wish List..

back pack: First stop: Indochina (thanks to Ray)swim in a volcanic crater(albeit the much preferred backstroke)visit antartica (imagine the concept of no noise)back pack: the rest of the worldback pack: the amazon become an astronautYou can keep ur money, keep ur buildings, keep ur gold, keep ur material possesions, keep you r morals, your ethics, your chivalry, your sexuality.. give me that tiffanys n gimme the world.. my footprints all over.. is all i want.. gimme stone beds, gimme a dime's grub... gimme wt ever bt most of all gimme the right to walk all over you.It is better after all to have lived, loved n lost it all... than to have not done any at all.


The inside of my mind.. carve out a path if you will..

That's an amazing pic i think! Either ways.. there's nt much to write in here.. just been work n work.. a movie here and there and more work.. someone told me the semester is soon to come to an end.. how appropriate though.. ha ha it hasn't even started and we're stuffed with the end.. one more sem left.. argh.. to make it to what is called popularly the life of the graduate.. joy!

Apart from that.. i realized how entangled things can get when ur close to it.. repeat it enough number of times, and then you realize that really, everything when repeated again n again have the effects of dissipiating into nothing..nothingness... breaking up letter for letter.. making no sense.. he he it's all absurd as they say..

I shall shut up.. try to get back into bed to relieve myself of this apparently self induced bt nt really, insomnia... bt its more climatic thn havin ne thing to do wit will power.. simply put.. it's jus…