28 January 2010

Round 1- Defeated

There was a time in college, where I went through bad times. It was a carry over of a bad relationship that went wrong, out of reasons that are symptomatic of youth. He was jealous, and I was callous. It sounds simple enough, but it was a huge step for me.

I was unprepared to deal with the 'public' outlash of such a break up. Suddenly, there were people trying to sort things out, people trying to figure out who was wrong, people trying to help us move on (that is to put the term politely). What was a two person thing, just became a carnival of apparent relationship doctors, gossip mongers & opportunists.

Needless to say, thing
s got messy and rather gray. But that was college, so many years ago (ok not tooooo many, don't get excited, I'm not THAT OLD)... and I was recently reminded that somewhere along the way, love seemed to have turned to hate.

And I got angry, I lashed out, because it hurt. It was not physical, and it certainly wasn't a result of something that the other person did to me. It was the way it had fallen apart, or rather degraded. And it amazes me, how things go from sweet to sour in a matter of months, weeks or even days.

So I reminded myself, that college is not a line that holds all the bad memories at bay. It can continue, and follow you to the darkest of times and to the happiest of times. The only one with the power to stop these experiences is yourself, when you decide to stop giving a dam. In theory anyways... :O)


The Solitary Kid said...

As long as you come back strong from phases like these...you've nothing to worry about! :)

Saro said...

yea, we can take strength in the fact that it's just a phase!

Mural! said...

like your header says about life......."it goes on"
you do have a nice way with words

Saro said...

It's so sad, though that it does go on! Sometimes its pleasanter to linger

Ashtung said...

so true... though i didnt have any reationship managers around but the feelings were pretty much what u described...

good thing is, after some time, u manage to laugh over it n sometime later, even mean it...

Sowmya said...

I liked the use of language in the 1st/2nd para - about the carnival :)

You are talking about love turning into hate in a few months or weeks.

It amazes me to know that it can happen overnight.

Actually the process actually takes months. We let it remain inside - dislikes, annoying habits of the other person, advertant/inadvertant offences, differences - like molten lava deep inside the mountain.

The last straw breaks the camel's back in an instance and the volcano erupts.