23 October 2008

Firecrackers

Disclosure: This is going to be a self-centric post.

I have realized that people can come a long way. A couple of months ago I had this aversion of talking in front of people. An aversion that has lasted for the longest time. It's amazing that I've overcome that, easy to find myself at ease in talking to 23 people, not children but grown individuals. Smart, interesting people who all have the capacity to judge bullshit.

So much for the sweaty palms and dented confidence from all those presentations all those years ago. So now I know, it's not that difficult to climb a mountain, if you get through the first couple of steps.

On the side though, it's been one hell of a week. Not in a good way. A long week and an even longer day. I find myself reaching out to my little green organizer more times in the day than my cigarette pack, thinking to myself, there must be method in all this madness.

I hope my green book will provide the methodology to analyze this chaos that is eminent. And underneath it all, I have this black fear that I imagine this madness to ignore the real boredom.

I guess I don't know at the end of the day.. maybe I am just plain loosing it.

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