03 April 2005

Maddening Thought Bolt Bombardment

missing u...missing u...missing u...missing u....missing u....my heart is so heavy...tears brewing under.... if u were here right now... i'd feel so much better...i can't forget...i hate myself right now... why does he always make me feel so ashamed? So sick of myself..how can he do that...why does he have the power to make me feel so shit... please come now coz i need someone like u more than ever... i'm never too big on admittin...bt yea i admit..i need u now...i'm scared of him..i'm tired of caring...uncaring...caring...being confused...why tie my legs and push me under water in that i manage to stay but afloat only a short while before i fall again into the water till i can't breathe ne more and then my heart feels heavy like it feels right now except then i feel more comforted because i will die shortly and now i knw that i will have to wake up tommorow to see the bloody sunshine again. I can cry unfair and i want to plead unfair i wanna see what's goin to happen tommorow and the day after i wanna knw if doin this here will make u come back i wanna knw if i can will ever see u again for right now i think i never will see u and that my life will be filled with people like him that make me scared make me whimper within while all the time i try to keep a brave face and tell myself no ocean is too large for a swim no pebble too small to lift but i knw that at the end of the day none of this will happen like a battle between my left and my right my logic and my emo i wanna be numb i wanna be urs i wanna be most of all rid of him and them that think like him and act like him and more importantly them that wanna be him how odd and disgusting that there would be people that would wanna immitate that imperfect creation or that creation that which mutated to become that thing that i fear that thing that i loate that thing that makes me not want to see the sun tommorow..i need ur help i need ur grace i need ur courage and i need someone i cant do this alone ne more..i don't wanna be one ne more i want u now please come and make him go away make him go away i fear he will come get me and make me turn into him i

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Bob Marley- Turn Your Lights Down Low

Turn your lights down low
And pull your window curtains;
Oh, let jah moon come shining in -
Into our life again,
Sayin’: ooh, it’s been a long, long (long, long, long, long) time;
I kept this message for you, girl,
But it seems I was never on time;
Still I wanna get through to you, girlie,
On time - on time.
I want to give you some love (good, good lovin’);
I want to give you some good, good lovin’ (good, good lovin’).
Oh, I - oh, I - oh, i,
Say, I want to give you some good, good lovin’ (good, good lovin’):
Turn your lights down low;
Never try to resist, oh no!
Oh, let my love come tumbling in -
Into our life again,
Sayin’: ooh, I love ya!
And I want you to know right now,
I love ya!
And I want you to know right now,
’cause I - that I -
I want to give you some love, oh-ooh!
I want to give you some good, good lovin’;
Oh, I - I want to give you some love;
Sayin’: I want to give you some good, good lovin’:
Turn your lights down low, wo-oh!
Never - never try to resist, oh no!
Ooh, let my love - ooh, let my love come tumbling in -
Into our life again.
Oh, I want to give you some good, good lovin’ (good, good lovin’).

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